We started looking at flooring last August. We'd talk to a few different places and look at few different options. Meanwhile I was preggers, about 8-9 weeks. The morning of my nine week appointment I started to get excited about everything. We had decided that if everything went well then we'd tell our news.
Every appointment I had gone to I had braced myself so I wouldn't be so disappointed. Quick note, no matter how prepared you think you are when they tell you the heart has stopped beating it still hurts the same. I would even say more because you were unfortunately right.
Since we'd been looking at flooring I decided to bury myself in bids, best offers/deals, etc. I tried my hardest to ignore what had just happened. It worked for the most part but as soon as I had any down time I'd think of what happened. Why, how, why us, what did I do wrong, etc... Once the floor was completed and I didn't have anything exciting or challenging to think about the depression hit full force. I have to say it was shorter lived though. I have some friends that I'd try to run with but sleepless nights were too much for me. Thank you ladies!
FYI...I've come to terms with what has happened and I know that I didn't do anything wrong to cause our loss. I've learned how to move on this time. Still not sure if we want to venture down that road again, 3 for 8 doesn't give us the best odds. Nuff said:)
BUT...I do LOVE the new floors!!
6 comments:
Kim!!! My heart is breaking for you! I had no idea you were trying again! I'm so sorry. I know those words are of no comfort, but please know how much I love you! You are the best mommy ever to the kiddos you have, and they are so lucky to have you. I wish I could do anything at all to help you. :(
Love & miss you always!!!
I wish that we knew why we have to go through these hard things. It seems so unfair sometimes, but I'm sure there must be a good reason. You are an amazing person and I admire your strength and goodness. I wish that I could give you a hug from one mom to another!
Kim..I am so sorry . I have been there on that side of the fence a couple times and it is not fun. Your floors are beautiful..I love love the dark wood. I am seriously thinking of getting wood floors instead of carpet next..because like you said, they can LOOK clean..but the crap is all hidden below. NASTY!!!
Yep. Jealous of your floors....they turned out so beautiful.
I'm so sorry about your miscarriage. I wish there was something I could do. It breaks my heart. It just doesn't seem fair. I love you though. Bunches and bunches. You're a great friend, a wonderful example, and a fantastic mom to you kiddos. If you ever need anything let me know! ((hugs))
Your floors look sooo wonderful. I love them and I can´t wait to stand on them. I can´t say it often enough. I am sooo sooo sorry. I pray for you and your fam. BTW Croy looks so big already and he is so cute. Love you, K.
Kim, I just have to say that I love and admire you so much. You are the most amazing person I know. Keep strong and just remember one day we will get to raise those sweet souls. BTW I love your floors too and I am so jealous. :)
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